Ugly Girl Stories

I was the Tar Baby, the black and ugly girl that people readily used and berated for pleasure.

I was so confused as a child.

How could I be God's Child, perfectly made but my own people said that I looked like a mistake, a burnt piece of bread that God actually forsaken.. 

My frustration with society, with hw my own people saw me, set me on a journey to find out what my value actually was.

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I stumbled.

Tried to act and look like a white girl. Bleached my skin and straightened my hair to "soften" my manly looking features..

Tried and tired and tired, but my self esteem never elevated  because I did all those things for the validation I assumed other people could give me..

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And I decided to divest. To arrest my emotional need for approval because quite frankly, I was tired of worrying about the way I looked. I was tired of chasing the love of men. I was tired of pretending that people weren't take emotional OR financial advantage of me..

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I COME FIRST ALWAYS!! And Now I am fulfilled and emotionally content with who I am!

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